Are you afraid to disagree with people? It can be difficult, especially in another language. Directly saying ‘I disagree…’ or ‘I don’t think so…’ might upset the other person. But, sometimes you need to give your honest opinion. Maybe it’s an important topic.
Here are some ideas and phrases you can try:
Show you understand
Before disagreeing, show the speaker you’re listening to their opinion. Show that you understand how they feel. This will also encourage the speaker to also listen to your opinion. After listening, try using the following phrases before you disagree: ‘I see your point, but…’ or ‘I understand, but….’
Make your language more indirect
Try disagreeing using ‘softer’ language. You will sound less confrontational. Start your opinion with phrases like ‘I wonder if…’ or ‘But don’t you think…?’ But be careful not to be too indirect. The listener might not understand that you’re disagreeing.
Give reasons for your disagreement
Support your opinion with reasons. This will show the speaker you have thought about your opinion. Speakers will often respect you more for this (it will also show you are not just trying to be difficult). Support your opinion with phrases like ‘The reason is…’ or ‘This is because….’ Sometimes it’s also good to give examples.
Don’t forget to be polite
Show respect to the speaker by being courteous. This will help keep the discussion non-personal and professional. Before disagreeing, try using phrases such as ‘I’m sorry but…’ or ‘I’m afraid….’
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Extra tip! What can you do if the speaker gets upset about your opinion? If there are more people in the discussion, try asking other people what they think, for example ‘Let’s see what everyone else thinks.’ If it’s just two people, try saying ‘We don’t have to agree on everything’ or ‘It’s okay, I guess we agree to disagree on this point.’ |
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